If you have someone who makes you smile all the time, you would be the happiest person in the world. If you are all smiles at the moment, be grateful for such a cheerful present.
Smiles make us peaceful and calm whatever the situation is. We can smile not only when we face a happy moment but when we are disappointed and at a loss as well.
Living together for a long time as man and wife, partners, friends, or collaborators, sees both sides of a smile. We smile when we are enlivened, encouraged, and satisfied; we also smile when we make a mistake and find it somewhat awkward. Whatever the reason for a smile, smiles release tension and stress, heal inner pain, and make us healthy, young, and optimistic.
"You Make Me Smile: a successful marriage story," written by three authors including Ahn Mee-kyung, introduces various episodes based on experiences in married life and the religious community.
Ahn says that the meaning of a relationship and the mental attitude with dialogue to maintain that relationship is important. When we make an effort to sustain our relations based on honest dialogue, we can freely and truly love one another. What matters most in life is this love.
As you know, our country comes second in the number of divorces per year. It's a pity to see that couples nowadays tend to get a divorce more than ever. Furthermore, the whole country is saddened upon hearing about the tragic accident of the shooting at Virginia Tech University.
Don't you think all these happenings come from the distorted experiences of love in the family? I dare say that the basic cause for such news might be the problem of unbalanced family life.
Very often, every type of crime and misconduct originates from unstable family life, for children learn by watching their parents. The married relationship is the basis for every relationship and social life. It's clear that habitual behaviors often come out of childhood learning in the family. Surely, leading a happy married life is the elementary school where we can learn love, faith, and hope from a harmonized relationship.
Considering the crucial importance of the family as the basic unit of society, "You Make Me Smile" deals with a very timely subject. Based on a special lecture on marriage at Sogang University held for 26 years, authors have contributed a lot to help young people lose their distorted view of marriage and learn how to have a hopeful vision for a happy and satisfied marriage.
"You Make Me Smile" lets us recognize how weak and fragile we are to be easily hurt by small things in mutual relations; at the same time, it also enlightens us to see the beauty in weakness and accept the person as he or she is.
Marriage is the process of one becoming two with different personalities and tendencies blending together. In this process of building a house of love and unity, such values as listening, talking, loving, dealing with unavoidable pain, revealing the self as it is, understanding others from their points of view, deciding to love with the heart and action, being free from a misunderstanding on marriage, forgiving, and realizing God's plan in every situation become the stepping stones to move forward.
Prof. Moon Yong-lin recommends this book by pointing out several points for a better relationship. First of all, it is important to understand the situation from the perspective of others. Then, we should open our hearts and talk honestly without suppressing feelings, forgive and ask for forgiveness to do better in the future. Only when we understand others through dialogue and forgiveness, does the value of life and happiness become known.
When do we feel we are loved most? Some people say that they are loved when their partner says "I love you." The greatest desire we have as humans is surely the desire to be loved and to love. So, we love each other and some of us get married and are united. We love others as much as we love ourselves. Loving, expressing, and encouraging others is the way to love the self and the world.
All these behaviors of communion are learned in the family. It's beautiful to see the family coming out together to enjoy themselves while walking in the park or climbing a mountain. Let every family be healed and abundant with affection and respect!
https://www.koreatimes.co.kr/www/opinion/2007/04/137_1937.html
The
Korea Times/ Thoughts of the Times/ April 28, 2007
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